"Well, the painting was done during MS, but before I was terribly affected by it. ("Avant le Déluge fro my previous blog) I could say that the dark stormy background was maybe somehow indicative of my state of mind at the time, but I still have an inclination for dark, stormy backgrounds, although this one, which I am just starting work on, does have the sun appearing above the clouds:http://www.cpnhelp.org/?q=sarahs_illustrated_blog_0I did say somewhere in the Regimens section, over eighteen months ago, in reply to someone's question, that I didn't think I had MS any more. Now I think I will answer in a slightly more grown up way:I can certainly say that I have had no MS event since starting treatment, but have only improved. This improvement was sometimes a bit up and down, in the two steps forward, one step back mode, but with my diagnosis by one of the Addenbroke's chaps, I should only be getting steadily worse, in fact so rapidly that I shouldn't be here now, writing this, let alone disturbing David all the neighbours with bashing together three large stretcher frames for my next paintings. But when can I feasibly say that I no longer have MS? Some days, in some situations, I still walk as though I do, at other times I can look completely normal. I still have many visible lesions in my brain, but all except the very oldest ones are fading, gradually becoming smaller, not getting larger and more profuse.I guess that I can say I no longer have MS, but "authority," something I have never had much respect for, would say differently. If I filled in a form for travel insurance, say, if I ignored the MS diagnosis and I had to claim for something, not MS related at all, I would have the claim rejected, never mind the fact that I have never, ever had to claim for anything. In fact, I am so certain in my own mind that I don't have the disease any longer that if not for the fact that I feel the need to guide people through the CPn maze until the exit is clearly visible, I wouldn't be still writing on ThisisMS or CPNhelp."There is going to come a time when I won't be writing here and I sometimes feel already that I have been around for too long, but things do suddenly seem to be reaching that point where things are pushed forward by momentum, where change can no longer be stopped by the auto-immune brigade. What I do wish, though, is that this sight doesn't lose track of the fact that it is called CPNhelp, not anything else. Co-infections are just that and by and large they get sorted once the immune system is made strong enough after ditching the prime CPn infection. Secondary porphyria is a real concern, mainly to people with the prime infection somewhere other than in their brain, but recently every other topic has been concerned with secondary porphyria. It is a concern of mine that people who really need treatment might be out off by all the talk of the pain and agony that seems to lay ahead. People like me who weren't in any particular pain, but needed treatment desperately. David keeps saying that I wouldn't be here now, if I hadn't been treated when I was: I can't disbelieve him. Yet I only had MS, which was caused by a CPn infection in my brain. David has seen people, even still in their twenties, unable to move in a hospital bed, twisted with spasticity, fed into the stomach, pemanently catheterised. That is MS for some people and that would have been me............Sarah But here is a happy picture, the lavender fields of Provence: An Itinerary in Light and ShadowWheldon regime since August 2003, for very aggressive SPMS. Intermittent therapy after one year. 2006 still take this, now two weeks every three months. EDSS was about 7, now 2. United Kingdom.